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G a r y C h a p p l e M o v i e s |
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THE PROTECTOR; TRAILER PARK BOYS; SHORTBUS; OPEN SEASON; THE DAMNED;
MARIE-ANTOINETTE; UTAMARO AND HIS FIVE WOMEN; THE PRESTIGE; PLAYTIME; BORAT: CULTURAL LEARNINGS OF AMERICA FOR MAKE BENEFIT GLORIOUS NATION OF KAZAKHSTAN; FLUSHED AWAY; SLEEPING DOGS LIE; STRANGER THAN FICTION; CASINO ROYALE; ROSSELLINI'S LOVE & CHASTITY; HAPPY FEET; VOLVER; THE FOUNTAIN; MONKEY WARFARE; PAN'S LABYRINTH; CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER; DREAMGIRLS; CHILDREN OF MEN
THE PROTECTOR
Sunday, October 1st, 2006
For kicks
The movie i saw was The Protector, called Warrior King in the UK (even though he’s no king), and Tom yum goong (“Prawn soup”?!) in Thai, starring Tony Jaa, from Ong-Bak. We get some background on his family’s history of raising elephants for the royal family, and their need to protect the elephants. But once his father is killed, and elephants kidnapped, then the asses start getting kicked, fast and furiously (seriously, it was like someone turned a switch on).
Apparently 25 minutes were cut from the North American release, and it shows – i have no idea how the taxi driver related to the story, why the police commissioner was shot, and we get other things showing up which need to have antecedents in the story.
Even at that, it’s still a strange movie. The character Kham (i.e. Tony Jaa) is called ‘Cam’ in the subtitles. We have some crime syndicate boss announcing to the public about their good business relationship with the mayor and the police – at least in Western culture, it would be a very odd thing. I’d swear the English voices were dubbed. A female romantic protagonist is introduced, but really has no role to play – Tony Jaa is too busy running along walls and breaking limb after limb to have time for romance. There’s a cameo by someone whom i thought was Jackie Chan, but it was actually a Jackie Chan double.
Even compared to Ong-Bak, the whole plot is preposterous, but when you get down to it, no one goes to a Tony Jaa film for the plot. You go for the ass-kicking. And head-kicking. And limb-breaking. And that is pretty amazing, especially considering it’s all real (no special effects, no wires).
"The legbone is connected to the…" ... or used to be, anyway.
TRAILER PARK BOYS
Friday, October 6th, 2006
Don't you have some off's to fuck?
The movie i saw was Trailer Park Boys: The Movie, a.k.a. The Big Dirty, based on the Canadian TV series, which is kind of like My Name Is Earl without the sentimentality. It was pretty funny.
"You're boob-nervous."
"I'm not boob-nervous."
SHORTBUS
Saturday, October 7th, 2006
Voyeurism is Participation
Saturday i saw Shortbus, by John Cameron Mitchell (a.k.a. Hedwig of Angry Inch fame). It’s notorious for the sex scenes not being simulated, and in particular, in Canada for that including Sook-Yin Lee, rock musician, former MuchMusic VJ and current CBC TV host. There was more gay sex than straight sex (although close to no lesbian sex), and it was pretty explicit (including autofellatio and a male 3-way with salad-tossing). One review described it as the ‘feel-good hardcore movie of the year’, which is pretty apt. It’s mostly pretty fun (although many in the audience were taking it far too seriously), although it certainly has its dramatic moments.
"It's like the '60s, only with less hope."
"Voyeurism is Participation."
OPEN SEASON
Tuesday, October 10th, 2006
At least it wasn't about zoo animals.
Tuesday i took my car in for servicing. While they did what they had to do, i went to see a movie.
The movie i saw was Open Season, which was just okay. The story they bought used from Disney. I laughed a couple of times. Not nearly as bad as Shark Tale.
To the tune of Teddy Bears Picnic: "Once there was a magical elf who lived in a rainbow tree / He lived downstairs from a flatulent dwarf who constantly had to pee. "
THE DAMNED
Saturday, October 14th, 2006
"Black leather, black leather, rock rock rock"
The movie i saw yesterday was The Damned, a British movie from the 1960s. The leader of a gang of 'Teddy Boys' (looking more like rockers to me) in Weymouth uses his trollop sister as bait to rob an American tourist. When she escapes on his yacht, the gang roams the coast looking for revenge, which leads them to a government scientist secretly experimenting on nine children. A bizarre mix of teen gangs, romance and apocalyptic sci fi, it'd be like an alien space ship suddenly showing up in the middle of a Jacques Demy film (or Blow-Up meets A Clockwork Orange). Although some of the acting (especially Oliver Reed as the top Teddy) is over the top, it's not just a cheesy sci-fi horror flick - it touches on the fears of nuclear apocalypse being at the height of the cold war, and raises some interesting questions.
"Last one to the Unicorn's a cube!"
MARIE-ANTOINETTE
Friday, October 20th, 2006
Let them eat brioche.
Yesterday afternoon i saw Marie-Antoinette, Sofia Coppola's latest take on feeling isolated in a foreign land. It was fairly historically accurate, although it's not a political movie or a history of the Revolution - it's a story of teenagers being thrust into situations beyond their maturity. She was 14 when she was married (and 21 when it was consummated). It was a lot of playful fun - well, at the beginning. Of course, it ends very badly for her and her family, but we don't see much of that. I loved the pop music - she and i share a passion for Bow Wow Wow (an obvious connection to 14 year old Annabella).
"Dear God, guide and protect us. We are too young to reign."
Sadly, the ending of Princesse de Lamballe (the prudish one) was even more gruesome than most, being gang-raped, mutilated and murdered by a republican mob.
The audience was almost entirely female, and about 3/4 teen (the rest being boys and moms dragged along).
UTAMARO AND HIS FIVE WOMEN
Saturday, October 21st, 2006
Anyway, yesterday afternoon i saw Kenji Mizoguchi's Utamaro and His Five Women. Set in the late 1700s in the height of the Tokugawa Shogunate, it's about the idea that only art drives true artists, to the exclusion of all else - women's beauty is only relevant as artists' models. I enjoyed it although it seemed a little unfocussed, both in story and in image (since the subtitles were clear, it seems the film needs a digital clean up). It didn't help that my eyelids were very heavy, and there were 4-5 occasions when i lost a second or two of dialogue.
"Are you sure you don't want one that says "KEEP ON TRUCKIN'"?"
THE PRESTIGE
Sunday, October 22nd, 2006
"This is the part with the twists and turns, where lives hang in the balance."
Today i saw The Prestige, much better than the vaguely similar The Illusionist. It starts off with a violent rivalry in stage illusions between two magicians, but ends up as science fiction thriller. For the most part i found it pretty enthralling, except the ending left me feeling slightly dissatisfied - once having introduced the conceit, it could be used endlessly. There's also a missed opportunity to explore the nature of individuality.
There were some other actors in it too.
PLAYTIME
Saturday, October 28th, 2006
The movie i saw was Playtime by Jacques Tati, who also played Monsieur Hulot and who was apparently personally bankrupted by the film's commercial failure. It doesn't have a plot, barely any understandable dialogue, and no strong character development. It's a series of vignettes of visual comedy in a modernist version of Paris, i found it mostly more amusing than laugh out loud. It's a great take on humans adapting to their own befuddlement. It seems you need to see it many times to get all of the gags. It's a precursor of Mr Bean.
Oooh! Ahh!
BORAT: CULTURAL LEARNINGS OF AMERICA FOR MAKE BENEFIT GLORIOUS NATION OF KAZAKHSTAN
Friday, November 3rd, 2006
Verra niiiice....
The movie i snuck a Licks burger into was Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. Totally in bad taste (i felt kinda dirty after - i need to see Marie Antoinette as an antidote), but totally hilarious. .
"This one I have to pay money for, but she worth it! Wow wow wee waa!"
FLUSHED AWAY
Saturday, November 4th, 2006
Froglais...
I wasted most of the morning surfing. Lunch was all-you-can-eat-Japanese - i had miso soup, 3 crispy spring rolls, 3 gyoza, 6 avocado rolls, 6 veggie tempura rolls, and 6 ginormous veggie (sweet potato) tempuras. And free chilled orange to end.
The movie i saw today was Flushed Away. I can't believe i missed a good chunk of the beginning because i fell asleep! Anyway, i enjoyed it quite a lot - i thought it was fun and inventive.
An evil toad in a video cellphone being mimed by a French frog - how funny is that?
"I laugh at everyone's pain. Except my own. I am French."
SLEEPING DOGS LIE
Sunday, November 5th, 2006
Sunday the movie i saw was Sleeping Dogs Lie, a much better name than Stay. It starts off as a comedy, and ends up as a sensitive story about how we deal with things we wish we hadn't done, and whether honesty is always the best policy. Amazingly, it was written and directed by Bobcat Goldthwait, who looks very different from what he used to.
You'll feel sorry for someone who **** a dog....
STRANGER THAN FICTION
Friday, November 10th, 2006
The movie i saw today was Stranger Than Fiction, starring Will Ferrell as an IRS auditor who suddenly starts hearing his life being narrated, by an author played by Emma Thompson, writing a book entitled Death And Taxes. He's merely annoyed, until he hears that will will soon die. It was very funny and clever, and rather touching. It has an engaging romance angle too, although that's not really the what it's about. 'Thoughtful' - another good word.
"...the voice isn't telling me to do anything. It's telling me what I've already done: accurately, and with a better vocabulary."
I forgot to mention that i saw LMC after work on Monday. Wednesday was comics day. The rest has been just work. Oh, Dar's son is in the hospital with some sort of very serious infection. Today was the first day she's been back in a week. For some reason it seemed like she was brushing me off, although it's likely she's just very worried about her son.
Our cat's not doing too well - some problem urinating, and her fur is a mess - she used to be fine, then for the last few years, she's gotten matted in the spring, shedding her winter coat. Now it's like that all the time. Anyway, the urination thing may be a sign of deeper medical problems. She's just over 18, so she's a very old girl.
CASINO ROYALE
Friday, November 17th, 2006
I will be keeping my eye on our government's money; and off your perfectly formed arse.
Last night i saw the new Bond movie, Casino Royale, with Daniel Craig. There should be a ban on the words Live, Die and Day in Bond movie titles. Anyway, i thought it was really good - a Bond movie that was substance over style, less smarm and more grit. Interestingly, it's something like a prequel to the other Bond movies. The gadgets are more hightech and realistic at the same time.
Chris Cornell did the theme song - bleagh!
"Shaken or stirred?"
"Does it look like I give a damn?"
You're not supposed to shake a martini, and it would be silly for a bartender to offer it. The irony is, the idea itself comes from Bond movies. And it's funny how snobby (the old) Bond is about red vs white wine.
ROSSELLINI'S LOVE & CHASTITY
Saturday, November 18th, 2006
I saw a series ("Love and Chastity") of shortish features by Roberto Rossellini. The first was The Human Voice (Una Voce Umana), adapted from Cocteau's play. It consisted of a woman in anguish on the phone with her ex-lover over a series of calls. While i appreciated her emotional performance, frankly, the incessant talking drove me nuts.
The second was The Miracle (Il Miracolo) (the first two together being L'Amore [1948]), in which a naive peasant woman believes a man she meets is her beloved St Joseph (San Giuseppe). He says nothing, but shares his wine with her, and she passes out. She wakes up, and weeks later finds herself pregnant. Two monks debate whether miracles are real ("He's a materialist") - the town thinks she's a fool, but she believes she has been blessed.
The third piece is Chastity (Illibatezza), which was originally part of the anthology Ro.Go.Pa.G. [1963]. My favourite of the three, it's a view on our relationship with imagery. A beautiful but chaste Italian flight attendant films everything on her travels home to her possessive boyfriend . An American business man (who was sneaking looks at a Playboy while on the plane) becomes obsessed with her (or his image of her, really), and using a how-to guide to romance, starts stalking her. It's fairly funny, although, in reality, he'd be considered much creepier now than he would've been then.
Love, American-style
HAPPY FEET
Sunday, November 19th, 2006
I saw Happy Feet. I wasn't really sure how to take it. There's something about it i liked, although i can't say what (well, it's better than Shark Tale). But it has so many problems that i can't recommend it.
The story is really all over the place (and i hate it when they go so overboard about picking on a person - it feels more real when it's more subtle). Another kids movie that is inappropriately sexual at times. It's creepy that the main character still looks like a kid. We don't get to really know any characters except Mumble. It didn't really decide between being a cartoon or a nature flick - while it tries to emulate the naturalism of March of the Penguins, it also has this whole singing and dancing bit, and you can't really tell most of the characters apart. We get bonked over the head with the environmental message at the end. Robin Williams. It also has that 'speciesist' point-of-view which drives me nuts - sea lions are evil-doers, because, well, our protagonist is a penguin. If the protagonist was a sea lion, it would look handsome, and we'd see glowering whales or sharks.
Ice, ice, baby.
What's odd is, everyone else i've talked to didn't like it, but the reviews have been very positive.
VOLVER
Saturday, November 25th, 2006
The movie i saw Saturday was Pedro Almodovar's Volver , starring Penelope Cruz. The story revolves around Cruz's character, her husband, her daughter, her sister, her dead mother, her aunt, and her aunt's neighbour/friend of the family. The aunt has lost her marbles and dies early on, and apparently the ghost of the mother had been living with the aunt to help her (now where will she go?). The story involves three killings, cancer and incest and sex abuse, yet it's really a charming and moving comedy.
THE FOUNTAIN
Sunday, November 24th, 2006
Ii saw The Fountain, with Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weiss. It's about a man who has to come to terms with his wife's terminal illness, with the twist being he's a scientist on the verge of a possible breakthrough in treating tumours. Some reviews have described it as being the same couple set in three different periods, but that's not accurate. The past is actually a story written by the wife (although we are seeing it from his point of view as he reads it) about a conquistador trying to get the tree of life to save his Spanish Queen. The future is a more dream-like allegory. It touches on many issues, such as the Garden of Eden and cosmogony, on the nature of love, life and death, although it's more philosophical discussion than science fiction. I'm not sure it entirely succeeds, but i enjoyed it.
"Death is the first step on the road to awe."
MONKEY WARFARE
Saturday, December 16th, 2006
Radical chic
The movie i saw - at the newly reopened Royal theatre (yay!) - is called Monkey Warfare, a Canadian movie about a couple who live on the edge of society, combing yard sales and garbage bins for junk that is worth something (and they're pretty good at it), and a young woman who ends up being their pot supplier (their previous dealer having been arrested), and very interested in the couple's radical chic. I enjoyed it a lot - funny, a bit edgy, although maybe a bit self-conscious. It had an excellent (radical chic) soundtrack.
Horny ex-radical, young radical wannabe... why is he grinning?
The director was there to start the movie (didn't say much), but i didn't want to stay for the talk after (getting late). Funnily, i almost bowled over the lead actor when i got out of my seat - Don McKellar is a little guy. He's been in a bunch of Canadian movies (and is a director as well). He had brief role in a Maggie Cheung movie, and you may remember him from a bit in Kids In The Hall, where he played a bike courier. Also, the female lead was also in KITH, as the woman how had The Affair with Bruce McCulloch ("This is craziness").
PAN'S LABYRINTH
Tuesday, December 26th, 2006
The movie i saw is called El Laberinto del Fauno, translated as Pan's Labyrinth, although since the character describes himself as a faun (Latin for satyr), not as Faunus (Latin for Pan), The Faun's Labyrinth would probably be more accurate.
Regardless, it's the story of a girl, who travels with her pregnant mother to live with her new step-father, a Captain of fascist Spain, dedicated to destroying the remaining Republican fighters in the surrounding mountains. Helpless in the face of her stepfather's brutality, her mother's illness, and the war raging around them, she loses herself in her books and retreats to a magical quest, wherein she might become a princess in a magical realm.
The movie is amazing, the best movie i've seen this year. It's the darkest fairy tale i've ever seen, darker than any Grimms' tale i've read. Definitely not a kids' movie, it had me shivering in fear and shedding tears.
"Me? I've had so many names... Old names that only the wind and the trees can pronounce. I am the mountain, the forest and the earth. I am... I am a faun. Your most humble servant, Your Highness."
Creepy monster.
But not as creepy as the human monster.
No one said you wouldn't get dirty doing the quest.
The obvious question is whether the magic elements are true or not. It doesn't really matter, although it can be read both ways.
CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER
Wednesday, December 27th, 2006
The movie i saw was Curse of the Golden Flower (Man cheng jin dai huang jin jia - i wonder if the Chinese actually says Curse of the Chrysanthemum). It was an epic court intrigue set in Tang China, involving poisoning, incests, martial arts, fratricide and suicide (the usual stuff). The movie looked gorgeous, and was pretty enjoyable. I found the ending a bit of a let down, and wondered which of the characters i should care about. The choreography of the courtiers was amazing.
Gong Li trying to commit suicide with multiple golden hairpins.
What do you guys ever do? It's not even like you're Rockettes...
That's the thing about China - they just don't run out of people.
DREAMGIRLS
Friday, December 29th, 2006
After, i saw the movie Dreamgirls, which is an adaptation of the Broadway musical, loosely based on The Supremes (apparently the film is actually a closer adaptation to reality). I enjoyed it a lot, but i didn't feel emotionally connected in the way one might have. The Jennifer Hudson (the lead, though only billed 5th) and Eddie Murphy were quite good.
"Jimmy want a tranny!"
"Ah do declahhhe!"
CHILDREN OF MEN
Saturday, December 30th, 2006
The movie i saw was Children Of Men, set in England in the future, when all women have become infertile without explanation. The world is a wreck - England is totally sealed off, devastating war in the US and Europe, illegal immigrants are locked up into camps (and their lives are pretty cheap), and suicides and terrorism are daily occurrences. Clive Owen plays the lead, long-separated from his wife (a revolutionary), who still trusts him enough to give him a very important task - to escort the first pregnant woman in 18 years secretly out of England.
It was very good. Despite its setting, it is not meant to be 'science fiction', rather being a critique of the way society is setting. One can point to the illegal immigration issues in the US (literally building a wall against Mexico) and Europe, current immigration and refugee camps around the world, threats to freedom from noth terrorists (almost everywhere) and the state (notably the US).
British travel - safer than ever!
I'm here for my expository dialogue role?